Pinterest and the "Anti-Feminist" Movement

I've stumbled across quite a few pins on Pinterest labeled "anti-feminist", pictures of women in aprons captioned "This is what an anti-feminist looks like. Fear us."

I don't get it. Feminism is wanting equal rights. Why wouldn't you want that?

Some of the pins conflate misandry with feminism. MISANDRY IS NOT FEMINISM. Double-standards which skew in the favor of women is also not feminism. 

The fact that more men work in dangerous jobs is part of patriarchy, feminists don't want those jobs to be exclusively male. When I was in the military, women still weren't allowed in combat zones. Patriarchal bullshit. 

I want equal pay for women because when my husband retires from the military, he wants to be a stay-at-home dad. I think that's fantastic, and I fully support him. I am more than willing to be the primary breadwinner and support us so that he can stay home and homeschool the kids. But if I'm making 23% less than my male coworkers for doing the exact same job, that affects my entire household. It's not just a "women's issue", it's a human issue. He shouldn't have to work outside the home to make up the difference in my salary if he wants to stay at home. I shouldn't have to work two jobs to make the same a man makes at one. It's about choice. For everyone.

This? Not feminism.

It is never okay to strike anyone, your spouse or otherwise. Physical violence is the last refuge of the cowardly and insecure, regardless of what genitalia they possess.

I know men who have been victims of domestic abuse. Feminism is not saying that men do not suffer from domestic abuse. Real feminists(men and women) work towards making it easier to report domestic abuse, and work toward removing the social stigma of doing so, so that everyone can benefit. Female-on-male violence is horrifically under-reported, because of the extreme stigma against being beaten "by a girl". Because girls are weak and men should be able to dominate them, not get hit by them. Again, patriarchal bullshit. Domestic violence is about control, physical and psychological, and women are just as capable of men of hurting their partners.

Feminism wants equality. That means accepting that women can be bad. Just look at Margaret Thatcher. Part of what feminism is trying to accomplish is removing women from this pedestal of "can-do-no-wrong", dispelling the myth that it's okay for a women to slap a man, that women are naturally in need of protection. A pedestal is just as much a cage as any other small space.

If misandristic bullshit shows up in your Google feed when you search "feminism", that does not mean that those views are actually held by feminists. There will always be sexist assholes out there, of every gender, but actual feminism works towards equality. That's it.

I am a baking, sewing, knitting, crafting, stay-at-home wife and mother, and I am a feminist.
I do not hate men. My husband is awesome, my guy friends are super-rad. I do not walk down the street and assume every man I see is a sexist rapist-in-waiting. I hold doors open for others, and I've had doors held open for me. That's just being polite. Sometimes I make my husband a sandwich. Sometimes he makes me one.

I'll leave you with this talk by Tony Porter, in which he explains what the "man box" is, and why feminism helps men as much as it does women.